Somehow we have to channel this

My 5 1/2 year-old son is, well, a nag. There is simply no other way to put it. This child doesn't let go of an idea, question, comment, complaint, etc - ever. Distraction doesn't work, at least not permanently. He'll go along with the diversion for a while, but then immediately u-turns back to his topic du jour. The other night, he wanted us to do something for him on the computer involving giving him a password. We're having pop-up problems due to the downloads and such being done by the kids, so we told him no. Even as we patiently responded to the "why can't I have a password" pleas, he continued on with it. For, like, an hour. Never gave up, nor even diminished the amplitude of the whines and pleas. I think it finally took bedtime to get it out of his head. Truthfully, I was surprised when he didn't wake up asking the same thing.

This is just one example of the DAILY nags he performs. Somehow, somewhere, there is a good side to this; some sort of positive quality that, if "channeled" properly, will serve him well as an adult. But for the love of you-know-who, I don't know how to do that. For now, he just drives us crazy. I love him like the dickens, but sheesh, learn to take "no" for an answer. How do you teach a kid that?

On another front, I was helping out in M's classroom yesterday when one of the kids had to be removed for a behavior issue. He normally is the sweetest little guy, but he has some kind of issue, that, frankly, I don't know about and it's none of my business. But he's usually off in his own world, and doesn't like to do his work and, in particular, write (we encourage him by us writing a word, then he writes a word). Apparently, his behavior is deteriorating. Yesterday, the teacher simply told him that if he was stuck, he needed to ask for help, rather than just sitting there doing nothing. He wouldn't do it, and he became pretty unpleasant, even calling the teacher some names (nothing horrible, but things like 'meanie'). Since the rest of the class couldn't focus, someone was called from the office to remove him. That's when it really got bad; he had a pretty bad outburst. And the teacher told me that last week he had an even worse episode that really frightened the class, especially M. She hid under a table. So I had a talk with her about it after school, and reassured her that nothing bad was happening to anyone, that they just took the child somewhere where he could calm down. I think she thought that he was being taken to a torture chamber or something. I was surprised she never told me about it last week, but when I brought it up to her last night, she really had a lot to say about it. So I'm glad I was able to talk to her about it. I don't want her to think that going to the "office" is always a terrible thing.

When I was a kid, in about 1st grade (M's age), I was summoned to the principal's office. OMG, what have I done? I was absolutely terrified. I thought for sure that I would be given some sort of beating or something. Turns out they just had a question for me, but by then I was so worked up about it that I dissolved into tears while I was there. Obviously, it traumatized me, since I still remember it so clearly.

Isn't it funny the things we remember from childhood? Lots of stuff our parents forget about almost as soon as it happens, but our little minds retained it forever. As a mom, it really makes me think about what I do; I never know what seemingly insignificant event, statement, or detail will become a lifelong memory for my kids. Even now, they'll surprise me with "mom, do you remember when you/we.....?" Uh, no. They do, and they've been thinking about it, whatever it was, for quite a while.